kellianne: (2009)
This kid, you guys. He's so deep, but so silly. The other day he pointed at my frown lines and asked why I had them. I told him that they were wrinkles from squinting a lot in the sun. He got suddenly upset and said, "DON'T SAY THAT! DON'T say they are wrinkles!" I asked him what was so wrong with wrinkles and he said - "Wrinkles mean that you are old, and when you are old you will die. Then we won't be together."

I shit you not. This is our kid. He told us just yesterday, "I am lonely in my life." Apparently he wants another kid in the yard, but does not want a brother or sister because then he would have to share his room and, besides, babies pull hair and he wouldn't want to share toys with someone who pulls hair because that is not nice. I told him that his friend Alycah (full name: Alycah Zam, which her parents thought was hilarious until the first loud playground reprimand of ALYCAHZAM!! made all the parents stare- so funny) lived close by, but he says she's too far. 3 blocks is apparently too far! In any case, they are our new family to loooove and we have been spending lots of quality time together. I am getting happier and happier here as I build my Berkeley community.

I felt like there was an outside chance I was pregnant this month, and was so bummed when I got my period. What does that mean? I don't know. I waffle on this second kid business like no one I know. But then, I waffle about everything. And thus the frown lines. Seriously. I want a second kid! But I'm so wary of actually doing it because, geez, the first kid almost killed me and I have such an unease about the indentured servitude of motherhood (yes, there, I said it). With Niko being 3.5, it's so much easier, and so fun. Do I really want to go down the rabbit hole again? The thing is that if I don't go down that rabbit hole, I feel like I'll have a lot of regrets at the end of my life. It's such an conundrum. And I know it'll be easier with the second because I'm not a beginner parent any more. I understand so much more now the impermanence of it all. But I know that it'll also have many moments I feel like I won't make it through. And I feel so very protective of my sleep. There is still one hormonal week a month that I don't get much sleep, and I'm not a great person on little sleep.

Anyhow, I've talked about all that boring stuff before.

I could tell you about Thanksgiving. It was amazing! I cooked with a mama friend of mine in preparation the day before and it really saved my ass, plus it was so joyful. The night before the holiday, I got a bit high and decked out the table. As a result of these solid preparations, I hosted the prettiest and best tasting Thanksgiving I've hosted yet (third time is the charm, I guess). It was honestly perfect and super fun. There were 6 adults and 3 kids, and another mom came by with her son for desert, which is really the perfect amount of people to have over. I had everyone come with their list of things to be thankful for (one for every year of life), and there was such a solid representation of goodwill and thanks in this house. I will always thank the Goldbergs for sharing that tradition with us last year. We will keep to it for every Thanksgiving meal! It was grand!

In the days that followed, we had a ton of visitors over. Katie was here for the 2 weekends after. And even between those weekends, it's just been this wonderful wash of spirt making in the house. So much wine. So much food. I was definitely burning the candle at both ends though, and ultimately getting pretty grumpy until I told Buster last weekend that we were NOT hosting and definitely relaxing. That was a solid idea. This weekend we will also take it easy and prepare for the crazy of Christmas.

And after Christmas? I'm getting foot surgery. Fucking terrifying, you guys.

I was expecting a client an hour ago and she never showed, so let's thank her for giving me time to write this entry! Now I have to go and puck a dude up from preschool, which is one of my favorite times of the day.

The twitter holiday party is tonight. Whatever will I wear? Oh geez. I usually have this stuff planned out far ahead of time. Oh well.
kellianne: (Default)
Hello, Christmas!

I am feeling generally cheery and in a good place this holiday season, but I could really do without the uncontrollable coughs that seek to remove seemingly immobile phlegm inside my chest.

Truly, I don't think this cold would have walloped me so hard if I hadn't started out Monday's (disappointing) Prince concert with three shots of tequila. What was I thinking? Not sure I was thinking at all. It's easy for me to get quickly out of control when I'm with my VAIN ladies. Honest - I really haven't drank much of any liquor since getting pregnant. I'm a wine kind of girl, and usually quit after 2 glasses. If I'm at a crappy place and the wine tastes like sugar, I can't even pretend to finish the first glass. So tequila at a wood-paneled bar in Tacoma? Weird.

And fun, actually. That night was a lot of fun.

Since then, I have been busting my ass doing hair. And busting my ass with this sick toddler, who seems to have the same cold I have (I think I got it from his new-to-daycare self in the first place). Niko, as usual, has been sleeping something awful. But hello? SO BORING TO TALK ABOUT.

Mostly I'd like to talk about how he is the most adorable and awesome baby ever. Even at his worst, he cracks me up. He is obsessed with cheese right now because it's one of the few words he can say, so he's always hitting me up for some. Today he had some in his hand and was asking for more from the fridge. I told him to finish what he had and he turned on me! threw down his cheese! picked it up and threw it down again! and stomped on it repeatedly! Hard for me to show empathy when I'm laughing at him so hard.

Those tantrums are so far short lived and do dissolve when I make a show of empathy (which I did somehow manage today). Mostly he is awesome. His OK Cupid profile would read like this:

"I enjoy long walks in the Central District neighborhood while pushing my pink stroller (don't judge), songs with sign language, and dancing to modern music that sounds like it's sung by girls in the 1960s. I like to think of myself as cultural when it comes to food and will inhale anything you put in front of me that is Japanese, Italian, or Mexican. Books about the alphabet are ace with me right now, be they gothic and filled with ghosts (which my mother says "isn't seasonal"- but whatever) or written/illustrated by Dr. Seuss. I especially like to read from the vantage point of a lap. If you take something from me, I won't shout. I will, however, wait in a cunning and patient manner until you abandon my toy of interest before reclaiming what was rightfully mine. My attention span is probably longer than yours, so do not take my demands lightly. If you are sweet to me, I will give you the fattest face crushing cheek snuggles you will ever know."

Yeah, he's pretty great.

I've been meditating a whole lot on what Christmas should mean to us as a family, which means lots of memories from Christmas past have come up. Mostly, I remember raucous family meals and AWE INSPIRING first views of the tree on Christmas morning. Guys, I realize now as an adult that my parents did Christmas like no one else's parents I know. That morning was HUGE. The whole room would seem to be filled with presents, perfectly arranged around something like a new bike or, god, I don't know, a gorgeous baby doll perched on top of a mountain of gifts. Santa was BIG TIME in our house. I would go to the living room before sunrise and quiver with excitement.

The modern and adult me is all boo hoo about consumerism in this American society and blah blah blah - but the kid in me who got MAD MAD TOYS every Christmas is like OMG THAT WAS AWESOME. I think I can figure out how to balance the gift buying with the traditions- and frankly think my parents did a pretty good job with that as well (it was also all about family and our involvement in our church). I have to fully admit that I totally enjoyed spending money on Buster and Niko for Christmas day, and that I will be stoked to see gifts under the tree. I totally didn't go overboard, either. Some of the gifts are second-hand, most of them were on some sort of sale. And there are no where near what there were when I was a kid, but they should still make a little bit of an impression on Christmas morning.

On other Christmas tradition making fronts- we of course have an awesome tree but did not get lights hung outside (no outdoor plugs!!). At least I made wreaths a few weeks ago and hung some garland on our porch. I've also had mulled wine on hand for whoever is asking, candles everywhere, and I've been singing mad mad carols to Niko.

We are entertaining on Sunday. It'll be my first time doing so for the Christmas holiday, and I"m a little nervous. We aren't having many over, so my work is pretty light, but AGAIN, my family does this stuff UP like you wouldn't believe. For instance, my mother has a full and gigantic set of CHRISTMAS CHINA and entertains at least 30 people for dinner every year. She supplements the china with my grandmother's green depression glass for full Christmas effect. We always had a 10 foot tree in our house- and usually we went to a tree farm to choose it and cut it down as a family (so many delightful arguments and so much mulled cider!!). There are usually lit reindeers in the yard and there has never EVER not been lights on the house and a candle in every window. I have a lot to live up to! Having one kid now, I can say that I honestly and truly do not know how they found time to pull this stuff off.

In fact, HELLO TO PEOPLE WITHOUT CHILDREN! You have no idea of how much your parents love you or of the sacrifices they made to raise you. It's 24/7 crazy love/frustration/busy times when you have a kid, like you can't imagine. I am working on seriously developing my parent legs, and think I have come far in 2011. I have a lot more growing to do, but feel as if I have some time, and learn fast, so it'll be ok.

Gosh, I have so much more to say but am coughing my head off and have a migraine as a result. So I guess I'm off to bed.

Merry Christmas, friends! (Or whatever you want to call it!) It's dark out there and I hope we all feel the love through it all!
kellianne: (Default)
Home-improvement is extra fun after spending hours pouring over design magazines and talking about what we like and what we envision.

We've just ordered our new rug and wall paper! This next month is going to be a flurry of pulling crazy ideas together into something organized, clean, and well thought out.

I'm making Gado Gado for dinner tomorrow! Easy, healthy and yum-yummy. Tonight I made a curried butternut squash and mushroom soup, and I totally rocked some stuffed acorn squash yesterday and the day before. Squash is perfect this time of year, so warm and filling! I've been cooking up a storm lately. It takes up a lot of time to do meal planning, shopping, and cooking. I have total respect for awesome house-wives... I can't imagine doing home stuff with kids in tow. Throw in sewing, gardening and laundry? Forget about it. I'm actually looking forward to getting back to work when February starts. It's nice to have balance between my very strong domestic/social/workaholic personalities. Domicile, socialite, and worker bee. Man, experiencing any of the three full time would really freak me out.
kellianne: (Default)
The handyman is installing our new faucet!! I'm very excited.

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