Hugs

Aug. 20th, 2012 10:41 pm
kellianne: (Default)
[personal profile] kellianne
I have this problem with stress when things don't go my way. I really need to work on it, but am not quite sure how to let go. If something is on my schedule, I want it to happen on time. I guess it's a modern times conundrum and a common one at that.

Anyhow, today Niko and I got into a sort of argument. I was super amped to take him out on a sushi date at the mall and before having him pick out a brand new pair of shoes. We talked about it several times and he seemed stoked, too. (Backstory! I bought him shoes online and he refuses to wear them, but needs new shoes- so I thought that maybe if I got him to choose the shoes himself it would be all good.)

He was kind of a grumpy pants at sushi, which can be par for the course after he spends the day in daycare. I think he just gets tuckered out from being the best kid on the block at daycare! Anyone who watches my kid talks endlessly about how good and how chill he is and this is not quite the dude we see at home so I know that he's just saving his tears for the people he feels comfortable around. But he still seemed stoked to look at new shoes - so we went.

But once we were at the store he was a NO NEW DON'T LIKE IT monster. So we went for a walk and he was a NO WALK DON'T LIKE IT monster. I asked him if he wanted to go home and he was a NO GO HOME DON'T LIKE IT monster and he plopped himself down on the ground. I walked a few paces away from him and we had a staring standoff for 5 minutes while I took some deep breaths.

When I felt my NONE OF THIS IS PART OF MY PLAN rage subside, I walked over to him and sat down. I said - Niko. I'm feeling really frustrated. I was excited to try on new shoes and go for a walk. You are using your mean words and it makes me feel frustrated.

He touched my cheek and said very seriously - Happy, mama. Happy.

I said - You want mama to be happy?

He nodded yes and asked - Hug?

And really, who needs to spend money on new shoes when you can instead have a huge hug on the floor of the stupid yuppie mall?

Keep on hugging, y'all. It helps with scheduling conflicts and more.

Date: 2012-08-21 06:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] savia.livejournal.com
So adorable.

Date: 2012-08-21 08:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olamina.livejournal.com
This adorable.

Mothering? You're rocking it!

Date: 2012-08-21 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] arielmeadow.livejournal.com
I love this: "You are using your mean words and it makes me feel frustrated." THERAPY-TALK MOMS, FTW!

Our recent visit to the same yuppie mall was a rare success, because we ended up layering wanted activity on top of wanted activity, so that each transition was a party. Mac & Cheese! > Playground!! > Buying toy boat at yuppie toy store!!! > Going home to put the boat in the bathtub!!!! I think it's the only time a trip to UVillage hasn't been frustrating, and it's because each thing we did lead him to something he wanted to do EVEN MORE. It was total dumb luck -- I wish I could say I'd planned it. (Although you KNOW if I had, it wouldn't have worked.)

In Niko's case... it sounds like dude was just tired and needed a hug. I know the feeling!

Date: 2012-08-21 06:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] autumnwalkr.livejournal.com
Oh! That is so sweet.

Date: 2012-08-21 10:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cambridgejen.livejournal.com
Adorable! Amazing how 2 year olds can make us stop and do a total re-set in our thinking.

Date: 2012-08-23 06:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rackmount.livejournal.com
My kid is like this all the time. Super grumpy and yelling but then suddenly sunny and sweet. The sweetness is... sweet... but I am NOT programmed for roller coaster baby. The drama!

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